Durruti’s Column #5

Dear Durruti,

What’s so funny about Anarcho-Capitalism?

Bob B├╝tthert


Dear Bob,

The challenge in answering that question is where to begin and what to omit.

1. It’s not really Anarchism or Capitalism. Anarchists think Capitalism is ridiculous, Capitalists think Anarchism is ridiculous, but fucking everyone agrees that “Anarcho”-Capitalism is ridiculous, even people that don’t agree on anything else.

2. How can Capitalism possibly exist without the state? Private property is that which you don’t really need, that you can make a profit on because other people need to use it. That you have exclusive ownership rights means that you make the rules and you can exclude others from access to what they need if they don’t comply. That in itself is statist and if you don’t have the threat of the state’s monopoly on force or a private security force that would be exactly the fucking same, then people will just take what they need. Why wouldn’t they just take it from you if you’re depriving them of it?

3. How is it “voluntary” if people can either obey the rules on one person’s private property or gtfo, but the only other places they can go are also somebody else’s private property? If people accept your rule because everywhere else is ruled by someone like you, that’s not voluntary hierarchy is it. And its really no defence to say that people could work to earn enough to buy their way out, to buy freedom by buying their own private property. Some slaves were able to work their way to a kind of freedom, but that doesn’t justify slavery.

4. Anarcho-Capitalism seems to require it’s followers to have strange, Social Darwinist views about class, race, disability and gender etc, survival of the fittest views about competition in business and in social relations that make it clear that AnCap is essentially just fascism trying to steal the identity of more popular movements, to ride on the coattails of a different reputation to it’s own, as fascism always has. Beliefs about superiority and the separation of people with different beliefs and of different races and the totalitarian merger of the private sector and the state, as the private sector becomes the state. That, my friend, is fascism.

5. AnCaps claim John Locke, the father of classical liberalism and EMPIRICIST as a forefather of their ideas, but they themselves believe in Praxeology which is a completely made up science that rejects the scientific method of empiricism!

It would be a dystopian nightmare if it weren’t wrought with self-defeating contradiction and it would be scary for the world if AnCaps weren’t a predominantly white, male group of basement dwelling, fedora sporting, cheeto dust in neckbeard scratching keyboard warriors and paper tigers.